Need and Should

There were two twin brothers, Need and Should, who went to the same school and shared the same classroom Teacher. The boys looked very similar, and people frequently got confused which was whom. But, the boys had strikingly different personalities.

Need was a very passionate boy. When he entered a room, people became energized. Whatever Need needed, whatever game Need wanted to play, whatever idea Need vocalized became everyone's priority. Need was a fun boy, a natural leader. The children in the class found their validation and importance according to Need's favor.

Teacher admired Need. Need was always surrounded by laughing children. When he answered a question, Teacher lavished him with praise. When Need struggled, Teacher spent time with him to the exclusion of others. When a child got out of line, Teacher would pair him with Need on a class project, hoping Need would positively direct the other child. Teacher went home most nights and slept soundly, knowing that Need and the other children were happy.

Should craved attention, too, but he simply couldn't compete with Need's charisma. Whenever another child started playing with Should, Need would do something loud and attention-grabbing, drawing the child back. Should would end up sitting alone.

Teacher felt sorry for Should, and worried about the other children ignoring him. She kept her eye on him, but Should seemed happy enough. Teacher sometimes worried that she wasn't doing enough for Should, but it was very exhausting keeping up with Need and the other children.

So the school year began. Need commanded the playground activities and dominated the classroom discussions. Need's mood determined the mood of the classroom, and Teacher encouraged the children to follow Need's lead. Children gave the best parts of their lunch to Need, and those closest to Need felt very important. Keeping Need happy made Teacher's life easier, and the classroom felt like a busy, happy place.

Should learned and grew like the other children. He never competed for attention with his demanding brother and mostly played alone. His notebook filled with drawings that became increasingly complex.

Halfway through the year, something began to change. The children in the class grew tired of Need. It happened slowly, almost imperceptibly. Children started playing in small groups in the corners of the playground to avoid Need's bossy demands. Some stayed home, missing school, resentful of Teacher's deference to Need. Some children became disruptive and argumentative looking for opportunities to undermine Need.

Need became louder and more demanding, in response, but there were fewer children now following his lead. Those children closest to Need began teasing the children who had moved away. Need would scream and have tantrums. His ideas became more radical. Some of the children who had grown tired of Need would appease him, just to quiet him down. Others began hating Need, and hating school generally.

By the time Teacher noticed the change, the classroom was in chaos. Need was unhappy and took it out on her, distracting from lessons and encouraging bad behavior from other children. Teacher had to work much harder to keep him happy and therefore keep the peace. The more she tried, the more the other children rebelled against her. She spent nights lying awake wondering why the children in her class had lost interest in Need, wishing they could simply go back to the fun days at the start of the school year.

One day, the classroom chaos peaked. Several fights erupted during the day, most encouraged by Need. It made him feel important and powerful. Many children were listless and disengaged. When Teacher tried to teach a lesson, almost no one paid attention. Those who did made noises to disrupt her. Teacher felt disrespected, and was at her wits end.

She suddenly put down her book, and cleared her throat. "What would you like to talk about?" Teacher asked the class.

The class went suddenly quiet. Children who had zoned out suddenly looked at Teacher. The children had no idea what to say.

Need's hand went up. He urgently shook it in the air. He had several discussion ideas. The children looked at Need, then at Teacher. Certainly, she would simply allow Need to answer the question.

But, Teacher ignored his hand, even as Need's face grew red. "Does anyone other than Need have any ideas?"

The children just looked around in bewilderment. They had never suggested ideas of their own. They weren't even sure they knew how. It had been so much easier to simply follow Need. As the moments passed, the children became more fearful and uncomfortable. Need was getting increasingly angry, yet Teacher still ignored him. No one knew what to do.

From the back of the room, Should slowly raised his hand.