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My sons start back to school on Monday. My oldest is starting a new high school, and he's going in as a 10th grader. Many of the kids already know each other, and he's a little nervous about being accepted as the new guy. My youngest is going into first grade, and the only thing he's worried about is getting lost in the school. "What if I go to the bathroom and can't find my way back to my class?" he asked.
I reassure them and try to get them excited, but I know that nothing will replace a few days, a few conversations with new friends, and a few successful trips to the bathroom and back.
The new students at your college are going through the same things. They are excited, but completely uncertain if they are doing things right. So much is new. After the chaos of the first week or two, they begin to find some routines and build some confidence. Even so, the questions and the uncertainty can be overwhelming. Once the fun of orientation, sorority recruitment, or the first football games passes, a feeling lingers. Am I doing this right?
A new student looks around as the college community assumes its usual rhythm. Some fall into that rhythm fairly well. Others struggle.
One of the most important things you can do for these new folks is to seek them out a few weeks into their first semester and spend some quality time with them. Take a visible interest. Invite them along on something. See how their classes are coming, and help them deal with the ones that are kicking their butts. Ask if they are missing home or missing someone they left back home. Transitions are stressful, and people don't often realize exactly how it's affecting them until some of the madness of the first weeks has died down.
I'm taking my boys on a camping trip this weekend. We're just going to chill out, hike a bit. We'll probably have some stories around a campfire. What do you think of the new kids? How are your teachers? What still worries you? I want to give them a chance to process the first week and get their minds confidently on what lies beyond it.
For your new students, the first two week are about getting started. The third and fourth are about finding the rhythm and the routine. By the end of September, the weather starts to change, and it becomes a matter of confidence and performance. In my experience, these weeks are the ones where they need the most support.
Part of being a leader is recognizing when your people need you. An investment of your caring and listening will help you keep these young, overwhelmed members engaged. If you play it right, you can lock folks into some meaningful roles during this time, give them something to latch onto, and position yourself as a thoughtful, caring mentor.
